Mindset Archives - Raising World Children

Let’s Talk About Making Study Time Fun!

February 4, 2020

by Josephine O'Brien with One Comment Education Empowerment Mindset Parenting

Making study time fun! The holy grail of all parents. To make children enjoy the time they are missing out on their play and video games.

“The tree I had in the garden as a child, my beech tree, I used to climb up there and spend hours. I took my homework up there, my books, I went up there if I was sad, and it just felt very good to be up there among the green leaves and the birds and the sky”. – Jane Goodall

It’s back to school time in Australia! If you are anything like me in the midst of the excitement surrounding all the new school adventures my children are about to embark on this year is the ever present quiet pleas I am silently making to my children’s teachers for “useful homework please!”

Does your school give homework?

At our school the Junior Primary years (grades K – 2) have a set of sheets delivered on Monday for 4 nights of 30minutes homework and 15 minutes read aloud of their home reader each day, and all to be returned on Friday morning into the teacher’s homework box for marking. The teacher requests the spelling words to be written out each night. Also no longer than 30 minutes of time should be spent each night completing the sheets. If it takes longer the teacher needs to be advised.

Upper Primary (grades 3 – 6) are given sheets designated to Monday-Thursday which directly reflect and reiterate the weeks learning and are to be returned to the teacher’s homework box Friday morning.

Again spelling is written out using read, cover, write technique. Teachers’ advise that no more than 45minutes to an hour should be spent on the written sheets each night or please speak with the teacher. And again 15 minutes of read aloud time either of the designated home reader or the child’s own school library book.

Not this….

My kids usual approach to homework used to involve procrastination, getting upset and throwing a tantrum when I asked was their homework complete, procrastinating some more, and then… running around at the last minute in a total panic to complete it before bedtime. Topped off with a promise that it wouldn’t happen again tomorrow, and inevitably tomorrow arrived with a repeat of today’s homework events.

Simply the word “homework” used to invoke chaos and pandemonium even before a book, paper and pencil were involved in the equation. Add a dyslexia diagnosis and afternoons became simply stress central.

Definitely this… Afternoon Study Time!

How is this different from “homework” you ask?

We no longer use the word “Homework”! The idea of homework is associated with stress, anxiety and panic. No more of that!
Kids returning from school I asked for the schoolbags to be put in the kitchen next to the kitchen table.
The same kitchen table… the same work to be done, but… I made some major changes in my attitude. My attitude needed to reflect I was joyful and ready to learn.
I needed resources that brought joy to use only for “Study Time”. I bought a set of artists pencils for drawing and coloring, colored art liner markers for headings and outlines, and also a new lead pencil, eraser and notebook for each child.
At the old “Time for Homework” I call “Anyone for hot chocolate or tea?” and all three kids come running. I already have the afternoon tea snacks (sliced carrots, sliced cucumber, mini chicken nuggets, crackers and cheese) set in the middle of the table. I take orders for drinks and then ask them to get their books and study sheets from their bags and put them on the table. Then we all sat down together in the cubby house I made under the table with the snacks, hot chocolate and tea. Much giggling followed. Amazing difference!
I now have a different read aloud book that I can read or add an audiobook as we start afternoon tea. We started with “A Bear called Paddington”.
After “A Bear called Paddington” we read our school read alouds. Taking time to listen to each other. Very positive start! Variety in books is the key to making study time fun.
When it came to the writing we sat up to the table and I produced new colours to share and new pencils for our new “Study box”. Everyone was excited to start! All the daily sheets completed, including spelling and sentences with little fuss.

Study Time is fun!!

I learnt the level of struggles are all related to my attitude to homework! Make learning enjoyable for everyone!

Grab our book that helps kids build confidence and good decision making skills.

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How to Try Something New in 2019

January 2, 2019

by Courtney Harris with 11 Comments Empowerment Mindset

Looking at Your Patterns

I have been thinking a lot recently about the ways new routines and exploration inspire growth. See, as an INFJ, I am a creature of habit. For example, I eat the same meal for breakfast each morning (and have for a few years); I love getting to bed early (even if I’m the first one to leave a gathering); I like attending the same workout classes and going to the same grocery stores; I default to alone or quiet time versus loud, crowded, or highly-stimulating environments.

When my days consist only of these habits, I am comfortable, in a sense, but, as it turns out, I am also a bit lonely, bored, and uninspired.

This realization about my own tendencies has helped me prioritize learning new things! I have come to appreciate opportunities to try and experiment with new skills and hobbies. It is through doing new things that I become more myself. This article is an invitation for you to get curious about how trying something new can impact you and your family this year and beyond.

Learn Something New This Year

Here at the beginning of 2019, we each have an opportunity to pause and consider what we want our year ahead to be like. You might enjoy setting intentions– personally and/or as a family, and you can find my guide for this process here.

If words or phrases like play, fun, exploration, adventure, growth, change, curiosity are part of your hopes and dreams for the new year, I encourage you to consider trying something new! When it comes to learning a new skill or doing something you have never tried before, the benefits are plentiful.

When you try something new, you can…

Surprise yourself! Perhaps you pick up a new skill or hobby very quickly or maybe you discover a new passion. How cool it is to feel surprised by your own gifts, talents, and interests!
Connect with new friends and community members. New interests mean the potential for a new community! Friendships often begin through shared interests. Thus, when you step up to learning a new skill, you also give yourself an opportunity to meet new people.
Know yourself in a new, deeper way. The process of trying something new will help you learn more about your needs, preferences, challenges, and so on. If you go into the experience ready and willing to notice what comes up for you, it’s certain that you will learn something important about yourself.
Build confidence. Tackling a new skill will support you in feeling accomplished. Simply naming a goal and taking steps towards it can boost your confidence. Even perceived “failures” or mistakes can help you feel proud of yourself.
Increase resilience. Trying new things asks you to stretch yourself beyond what’s comfortable. When you meet challenges and face healthy struggle, you grow resilience! This will undoubtedly carry over into other parts of your life!
Expand your sense of self and the world. As you begin a new project or learning experience, you may find your perspective of yourself, your community, or the world expanding. This process might also bring you a sense of connection to others, your community, and the world.
Release an old habit or routine that isn’t serving you. As you take on new learning experiences, you may discover that some of your patterns are ready to be retired. When you dedicate yourself to a new interest, prepare to notice what you are ready to let go of, change, or alter.

Try Something New This Year

What comes to mind as you consider this phrase, “Try something new this year!”

What thoughts, feelings, and beliefs arise?

If you are facing self-doubt as you read this phrase, I invite you to notice it with compassion. Self-doubt and fear can try to swoop in as a protector; these sensations might be trying to keep you from changing because change is uncomfortable! When protectors show up, you might find a sense of calm though loving kindness practices; take the time to remind yourself (and your protectors) that growing, changing, and expanding are important aspects of your experience.

If specific ideas or visions come to mind as your read this phrase, I invite you to give them space. Write these words or images down; doodle or draw them out. Maybe you’d even like to describe these ideas aloud– to yourself or a loved one. Your sense of excitement and joy in seeing yourself take on a new interest is valid and important.

No matter what thoughts, feeling, and beliefs you are facing, you are worthy of trying something new! You deserve to experience new learning opportunities, and you are capable of challenging yourself to expand and grow. Plus, you’ll give yourself to experience the benefits listed above (and then some).

Now, how will you decide what trying something new will mean to you this year?! To help you take the first step, I created a list of 10 of my favorite ways to try something new. This list is meant to be a starting point. Please edit, add to, and curate a list that is meaningful to you and your family.

1. Take a class or course. Study anything you’re interested in from languages, to business skills, to gardening, and so on. You can enroll for in-person classes or explore a wide range of online offerings.
2. Find a mentor. Find leaders who you feel inspired by. No matter what goals you have, support is crucial. A teacher or a coach you see regularly can be a mentor. Likewise, a writer or influencer whose work you follow can be a mentor.
3. Read something new. Read a new genre, set a goal for how many books you’d like to read per month/year, or commit to a new series, the Sunday newspaper, or a magazine.
4. Create something! Express yourself creatively in a new way. Mediums to consider include painting, drawing, speech-writing, photography, writing, and knitting. How else do you like to create?!
5. Participate in your community. Show up for your neighborhood, city, and the world. For example, you can volunteer, participate on committees, block walk for campaigns, or attend school board meetings.
6. Find a new way to move your body. Do something that feels new and supportive to your body. Maybe you try a new dance or exercise class or morning walks.
7. Connect with nature. Explore new ways of being in and with the natural world. Try camping, hiking, or picnicking in new spaces. How else can you bring nature into your life? Or your life into nature?
8. Travel. Visit places near or far that you have never been. Take a day trip, a road trip, or a long-distance flight to see something you’ve never seen before.
9. Eat new foods. Dine at new restaurants, explore new recipes, or study cuisines you are less familiar with. Enjoy new flavors and notice the ways different foods nourish you.
10. Make new connections. Whatever you decide to try in 2019, know that you will have the opportunity to connect with many new people. Enjoy the process of learning about others (and yourself in the process).

I wish you all a happy reNEWing, and wonderful year ahead. This article is meant to support you, as a parent of caregiver, in growing and learning in the coming months. The bonus: each idea and tool can be shared with your children and teens. You and your family can take on new challenges together in 2019! If you are looking for support– or coaching is a new opportunity you’d like to try– I invite you to connect on a complimentary Discovery Call.

5 Words to Eliminate from your Child’s Vocabulary Forever

July 18, 2018

by Tammy Coin with 12 Comments Empowerment Languages Mindset Parenting Voices

How many times have you been told to “watch your language” or scolded a child and said “don’t say THAT word”?

In American society, we often polarize words as being “good” or “bad”. When I have heard these phrases, they are typically speaking of words considered as “curse” words or “foul” language.

In truth, we have words that are considered “good” that are not given a second thought and are actually quite disempowering.

In the process of observing my own words and thoughts, I found several of these “fly under the radar” words that were incredibly harmful to my life and I began to shift them. Celebration!

Once we begin to act as an observer in our lives and the lives of our children, we begin to see how words that are considered “good” words can be extremely detrimental to our growth.

Earlier today, I was out with my little three year old grandson. We were having a great time playing at a local park until…..out of his little mouth came the very first word on my list. Oh no! What was I going to do, how would I handle it. This was a critical moment!

The very first word in my list is CAN’T!

This particular park has playground equipment. In one area, were these posts that were large enough to climb, stand and step to the next. They were similar to stepping stones but off the ground. They led you to the balance beam and then to the slide. Here was this amazing little boy having a fantastic time, when all of a sudden he encountered a challenge a little too big for him. With encouragement from me, I said, “what if you can?”. I held his hand as he carefully took each step and made it all the way to the slide! He said “I can do it, Grammy!” and I said “Of course, you can”!

This word is one that we say quite often to ourselves when something is a little challenging. Our thoughts and words are powerful tools. We can use them to propel us toward greatness or keep us stuck believing we “Can’t” get there. It is important that we use them to move us forward.

Have you figured out other words that you should eliminate from your vocabulary?

If you were looking closely, you saw the second word in my list SHOULD!

This little trouble making word is full of guilt and shame. When you use the word should, start to observe how you feel when you use it. For example, “I should clean the house”. “I should call my mother”. How many times have you or your child been in a situation where you “should” on yourself? One way to re-frame this is to either do the task or do not do the task and simply let it go. Example would look something like this “I cleaned the house”. “I will call my mother” or “I choose not to clean the house right now”. “I choose not to call my mother, today”.

The next word on my list is used as a word to connect sentences. The trouble with this little word is the mind focuses on it and everything said after it and disregards everything said before it. Unfortunately, we often put the good stuff before the word and it is no longer heard.

The number three word on my list is BUT!

Let’s test out a few examples. “You did a great job cleaning your room BUT you didn’t make the bed right”. In this instance, “you didn’t make the bed right” is the only thing heard and retained. Another way to say this might look something like “You did a great job cleaning your room!” If you are looking for a teachable moment on the bed, consider using “Would you like to see a really cool way to make the bed? Let’s try this together!”

Re-framing the way we say words takes a little practice. Once we start to observe our language and how it makes us feel, it becomes much easier to empower our children with these new ways of speaking.

Number four on my list is actually the phrase HAVE TO!

When we speak and say we “have to” do something it has a heaviness to it. It certainly does not sound like anything we want to do. This can feel extremely disempowering and over time add to feelings of dread and depression. When we have a task that we do want to do, we often say “I get to”. As we begin to see everything we do in life as a blessing, instead of a chore, life becomes much more empowering and enjoyable. Think of this example “I have to pay the mortgage payment”. Yuck! Seriously, who would want to do that! When we consider the mortgage payment pays for the home that provides shelter for our family, we recognize it is truly a blessing. We honor it with the re-frame “I get to provide a home and shelter for my family!”. Which one feels better?

The last word on my list is a tricky one. It is used in so many areas of our life. We see it on billboards. It may be heard it places of worship. We freely use the term with others.

Number five on my list is the word HOPE!

This one is a little harder to see and understand. It was not until I really tuned into my body when I said the word, that I recognized how much it made me feel helpless. Consider this example “I hope I get to take a vacation this year” versus “I am taking a vacation this year”. What about something bigger, “I hope I can provide for my family” versus “I know I can provide for my family”. So much of our language that is considered “good” is often quite disempowering. The word Hope gives the impression that we have no control over anything in our lives and feels quite passive. I have found when my faith is at its strongest, I have no need to HOPE because I KNOW that I am open to receive and I am taking inspired action to create the desired results.

At the end of the day, the voice in our head and the words coming out of our mouths, allow us to create an empowering or disempowering reality for ourselves. Children absorb everything at a rapid rate. The thoughts and words that empower or disempower help to shape them for the rest of their lives.

Tammy Coin is a Mind-Body Wellness Practitioner, Transformational Life & Spiritual Coach, Author, Teacher and Speaker. She holds sacred space & helps you locate the unhealed emotions leftover from Childhood Abuse & Trauma that block the door to your authentic self. She then partners with you, using the pieces of her own life, to empower, motivate and inspire you to fully uncover and step into your Soul Purpose. You can find Tammy Coin and The Doors of Wellness at http://www.thedoorsofwellness.com on Facebook http://www.facebook.com/thedoorsofwellness

A Real Plan to Resist Negative Thinking

April 27, 2018

by Tammy Coin with 10 Comments Mindset Parenting Voices

The world we live in is filled with messages, both positive and negative. Humans tend to absorb more of the negative messages.

Once we have found ourselves in the trap of negative thinking, we may find ourselves increasingly out of balance and out of alignment with the life we aspire to live.

When we find ourselves in this spiral, we often begin to transfer that negativity to everyone around us, including our children.

In order to stop this cycle, it helps to have a plan in place before it starts.

A simple plan might look something like this: Be fully present when speaking to each other (eye contact is important);

Make a point to speak lovingly; Minimize all outside influences (electronics); Upon waking, set three positive intentions for the day ahead; Before bed take the time to list three gratitude moments from the day.

This type of plan is a lesson in Mindfulness.

Simply start by taking an honest inventory of your life and where you can begin to implement subtle, beneficial changes. This is not a judgement inventory of how you “should be” doing better. This is a loving, honest look at your real life and how you can add positive moments.

The best foundation for resisting negative thinking is adding a Mindfulness practice to your daily life. Mindfulness can be incorporated into literally every function of your life from the most mundane tasks all the way to a profound spiritual practice.