My Baby – The Cute Little Evil Eye Magnet

I an Indian,  born and brought up in a small north Indian town named Roorkee. Ours is a land where both modern and traditional way of life manage to survive hand in hand. Here medicine, science, modern technology, old wives tales and superstition all keep jostling each other for space on the same platform.

I always believed that coming from a family where education is valued above all else, I had left the ‘knock-on-wood’ world far behind. I believed this ,that is, until I thought the word “baby” out aloud.

Let me tell you having a baby is just not simply conceiving a baby and carrying to term. It is also not only delivering the baby and then focusing on keeping your sanity while raising the child.

Yes, having a baby is all this and it is also dodging landmines of dangers lurking in every corner, waiting to attack. Dangers that are above and beyond the explainable logical world.

No matter how educated or modern an average Indian family is, the minute a (much awaited) baby knocks on their world, everything changes.

[bctt tweet=”Most modern Indian families turn to old wives talesthe minute things go wrong for their bundle of joy. ” username=”contactrwc”]

I learned that an Indian baby is apparently a ‘magnet’ for all the roving evil eyes in the world. The minute I broke the news of the pregnancy to both the would-be grandmothers, all the possible dangers in the land of the evil became real.

Out came the spools of black thread, packets of chili, and salts. The only way I was allowed to step out of the house was with various threads and amulets hanging around my neck(to ward off the evil EYE) and armed with onion and garlic(to ward off evil SPIRITS ). It was at this point that I realized that I it is not just the seen that you are battling with but also the unseen.

At this point if you try to appeal to the progressive men in the family, they simply nod and go back to their newspapers. Afterall, why take a chance and it’s just chili that is being burnt and salts being thrown and neither is frightfully expensive.

Giving Birth to My Cute Evil Eye Magnet

So, after dodging all the dangers and managing to stay alive, you give birth to the precious baby. This particular tiny person has a magnetic field so strong that every roving evil eye on the planet finds it’s way directly and sticks to it.

Indian grandmothers come fitted with special antennas that come out the minute the baby is out of the womb. In a world where thousands of babies are born every second, these antennas can pick up the exact number of times their precious little person has been cast upon with the evil eye.

Even before putting clothes on the baby we put a black dot on the baby’s face. This is a very “smart” dot, which stares right back at anyone trying to cast an evil eye on the baby and provides round the clock protection.

Next level of security are the black and red threads, these come with the tag ‘protecting-babies-since-eternity’.

Only once all the security measures are in place is the baby introduced to the world. As a new mother leaving the house with the baby meant carrying the essentials like onion, garlic and of course the baby bag, might need a diaper or something.

As the world knows babies tend to fall sick, but not every sneeze, cough or crying spell can be explained through science or medicine. It might be the doing of one of the well wishers secretly casting an evil eye, and being the strong magnet that the poor little kid is, results in getting sick.

After surviving the initial zombie, new mom phase, I felt I now have the hang of things. I decided to go back to my life and was sent packing with bags full of chili along with the other security measures and the grandmothers teary eyed blessings.

Once we kind of settled down some of our friends decided to come and visit the baby. It was a pleasant evening, with us showing off our little person, until the last guest left. That was the moment the baby started crying, so we changed, fed and walked the baby. The crying turned to screaming so we checked for any fever or discomfort.

Still after one hour of trying all we can the screaming would not stop and we were on the verge of panic. We decided to pack up and run to the grandmothers and never return without one of them. That is when an alternate solution hit me and I went running for the forgotten chili and salts. Once again the unexplained rescued us. Baby just calmed down.

I have been playing part time sorceress since, as and when needed, because why take a chance. I have been surviving my mom life with the help of Google, both the grand mothers and of course the additional security measures of divine help, all in that order.

So even though none of us would call ourselves superstitious people but when it comes to our kids, we walk a very fine line. Iphones in one hand and chili in the other, we keep battling parenting. We try to balance logic with the illogical, because why would anyone want to take a chance?

Shalini Tyagi is an Indian,born and brought up in India,currently living in Dubai. She is mother of two school going children and is a stay at home mom. An avid reader, she has recently forayed into blogging to bring to light her writing skills. She hosts her own website tyagishalinid.com.
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5 Interesting Attributes of Mangalorean Catholics in India

5 Interesting Attributes of Mangalorean Catholics in India

Christopher Managlorean Wedding

Easter was celebrated worldwide on April 16. This Christian festival, which is actually holds more importance than Christmas, marks the resurrection of Jesus Christ three days after his death by crucifixion at the hands of the Romans. It also marks the end of 40 days of Lent, which is a period when Christians have a religious obligation to fast, pray and observe penance.

Estimates peg the number of Christians worldwide at more than 2.2 billion. Of these, around 27 million are Indians. Yours truly happens to be one among them.

Christianity in India

The history of Christianity in India is almost as old as the history of Christianity itself. As per ancient Indian Christian tradition, the religion and culture surround it was brought to India by Thomas the Apostle around AD 50 in a region that now forms part of the Southern Indian state of Kerala. It is also said that another Apostle, Bartholomew, disembarked on the western coast of India and spread Jesus’ message.

The number of Christians in the southern state of Kerala who practice the Syrian Orthodox doctrine of Christianity is evidence of the fact that India is home to some of the earliest Christians in the world.

However, Christianity in India spread significantly between the 16th and the early 19th centuries, when Portugal had colonies in India. Erstwhile Portuguese colonies in India, including Goa, Daman, Diu and Dadra & Nagar Haveli, and even Mumbai are known to be home to large populations of native Christians even today.

Between the 16th and early 19th centuries, Portuguese Missionaries, with the support of the Colonists, were able to convert hordes of natives in their colonies to Christianity (Roman Catholicism to be precise).

It is worthwhile, however, to know that not all of these conversions were done in the right attitude and spirit on the part of the Portuguese Missionaries. In fact, there are many stories of natives being coerced, sometimes with the threat of violence or attachment of property.

[bctt tweet=”I to belong to a family of Catholics who originate from the Mangalore district of the southern India, in Karnataka. Originally Portugese.” username=”contactrwc”]

History of Mangalorean Catholics

I happen to belong to a family of Catholics who originate from the Mangalore district of the southern Indian state of Karnataka. After a lot of reading and discussions with older generations in the family, I learnt that Mangalorean Catholics were originally inhabitants of the Portuguese colony of Goa.

Apparently, they had migrated out of/fled from Goa at different points in time for reasons ranging from the Portuguese Inquisition in Goa (circa 1560), the occurrence of famines and epidemics and political upheavals/wars. It is interesting to note that most of these Mangaloreans religiously held onto a lot of their Hindu/native Indian customs and traditions.

[bctt tweet=”Most Mangaloreans religiously held onto a lot of their Hindu/native Indian customs and traditions.” username=”contactrwc”]

Language and Dialects

Although the younger generation prefers to speak in Hindi (the national language of India) or in English, in traditional Mangalorean Catholic households the language spoken is Konkani.

Konkani is actually the language used by Goans and has a lot of Portuguese influence, but the Konkani used by Mangalorean Catholics is heavily influenced by the South Indian languages of Kannada and Tulu. Also, interestingly, the Mangalorean Konkani is written in Kannada script.

Bilingual Names

Traditional Mangaloreans will always have a Christian or a European name, and also a native/Indian middle name. For example, my full name is Christopher Roshan D’Souza. My brother’s name is Ravi Vincent D’Souza. You will also find a tradition of pet names like Pedru for Peter, Ijju for Isabelle, Mettu for Matilda, Gibba for Gilbert, Panchu for Francis, and so on.

History of surnames

Mangalorean Catholics bear Portuguese surnames. This is because our Goan ancestors assumed the surnames of the Portuguese priests who baptised them when they were converted, or their Portuguese godparents.

Hence, you will find surnames like Furtado, Pinto, D’Souza, Pereira, Gomes, Coutinho, Fernandes, and so on in the community. But prod the elders in the community a little and they will tell you the Indian surnames of their ancestors – Prabhu, Shenoy, Nayak, Pai, Kamath, Shet, and so on.

Christopher Mangalorean Wedding

Wedding Rituals

A Mangalorean Catholic Wedding will initially look like a European White Wedding in the Chapel.  Later, you will see Indian rituals like flowers being used to adorn brides’ hair, brides being draped with traditional red Indian bridal sarees (known in the community as ‘Sado’).

Bridegrooms tying Mangalsutras around their wives’ necks, farm produce like pumpkins, rice, betelnuts, coconuts, etc. being exchanged between families, and many others.

On the evening before the wedding, a ceremony known as ‘Ros’ is organised. This is for both the bride as well as the groom by their respective families. A symbolic purification and anointing is conducted by way of applying coconut milk on their heads, hands and feet – this is like a traditional Hindu ‘Haldi’ ceremony.

There is also a ceremony at the end of the wedding reception known as ‘Opsun’, which is similar to the ‘handing over’ ceremony called ‘Vidaai’ that Hindus practice, wherein the bride’s parents symbolically hand over their daughter to her in-laws and request them to treat her as their own daughter.

Warding off Evil Eye

There is a very Indian concept known as ‘the evil eye’. There is believed to be a curse cast unknowingly by a malevolent glare. It is believed that it can be caused either when someone looks at you with evil intentions, or envies you, or sometimes even when someone is extremely fond of you.

It is believed that receiving the evil eye will cause misfortune or injury. Traditional Mangalorean Catholic households follow the traditional Hindu way of warding off the evil eye with the help of salt, red chilli peppers and some exotic Indian spices.

These interesting trivia are merely the tip of the iceberg as far as the community is concerned. 

5 Interesting Traits About Mangalorean Catholics in India www.raisingworldchildren.com #mangalorean #catholics #india #indianvalues #tradition #oldwivestales

  Christopher Roshan D’Souza is father to a 3 year old boy. By profession, he has a Masters Degree in Finance. He is working as a Research Analyst with a reputed global data and insights company. In an alternate life, he is a blogger who loves writing poems and short stories. He has a keen interest in music across genres, is a football fanatic (Arsenal FC fan), and is currently learning to play the guitar. He also loves trekking to hill forts and photography. Christopher likes to describe himself as a Jack of a few trades and a master of some, and as an introvert who loves appreciation yet hates being in the limelight.

Pregnancy experience on a lunar eclipse

Being Pregnant In The Shadow Of a Lunar Eclipse

People’s excitement on viewing the solar eclipse that occurred on August 21, 2017, brought back my lunar eclipse experience.  Viewing an eclipse,  Solar or Lunar, total or partial, is no doubt an exciting event! Certainly, once in a lifetime experience. You have to be in the right place at the right time. But, in Indian culture, eclipses had certain superstitious beliefs. As a kid, talking and learning about eclipses were fascinating for me. But my parents restricted me from viewing the eclipse as it might be harmful to the eyes.

Mostly during an eclipse, I would stay at home with my working mom as schools would declare it as Holiday. Yet, sometimes I manage to sneak out and try viewing the eclipse. However, if it’s solar or lunar eclipse it always seems like an overcast day, perhaps a bit eerie, with the sun not shining as brightly.

Eclipse Rituals Followed in Indian Culture:

I wasn’t credulous enough to believe in the eclipse rituals knowing that eclipses are caused when these heavenly bodies, namely the sun, moon and the earth cross each other’s path. Nothing changed my perspective of not caring about the superstitions associated with the eclipse. Until I got pregnant!

 When I was 8 months pregnant on April 4,  2015, a Lunar eclipse occurred in India and the beginning of the eclipse was at 3.47 pm and it ended at 7.32 pm. I was supposed to adhere to lots of do’s and don’ts  during an eclipse as per my family’s advice. Even though I am aware that the stories and beliefs are myths, caring for a tiny human being inside me became cause for fear.

My pregnancy days made me weak. I decided not to look for explanations that question my baby’s safety. So my pregnancy brain worked in a way to believe the scary stories of viewing the eclipse.

My family’s rules for this day –

” Do not  cook or light a matchstick” – because the child would bear some burn scars.

“Don’t view the eclipse or step outside in the sun”- because if a woman steps out during an eclipse, her child will be born with marks all over his/her body.

“Do not  cut or stitch anything, not to hold a pen, keys or any sharp object in my hand!” – because chances are that the child will be born with a cleft lip.

“No reading or browsing” – because the child will be born with eye problems or eye deformity.

” No  eating or drinking anything” – because any food cooked or eaten while an eclipse happens will be poisonous and impure.

Finally, they decided it would be better if I stayed in a room, with the windows locked (covered with dark curtains).  I wondered how would I spend about 4 hours sitting idle inside a room without eating, drinking, reading, browsing etc. They suggested I should rest or sleep.

Sleep I did, but not too long especially when my family advised me only to sleep. It was the longest afternoon of my life. Fortunately, I had my child’s company who were listening to me from my womb. As the time approached the end of the lunar eclipse I was on a verge to break the door and get out. Finally, the lunar eclipse ended and the moon is out of the Earth’s shadow as am I out of my room. At last, I had to take a head shower and worship the God and I thank him for helping me to successfully complete the eclipse ritual. I felt relieved.

Putting my baby first:

I was not happy by playing dumb believing the myths but I remained satisfied for being a good mother.  My mother-in-law had no intention to stop me from seeing the eclipse other than caring for her grand kid’s well being and I respect her love. I chose to sleep over my logical-thinking out of love and respect for my baby and mother in law.

Ancient belief associated with Eclipse:

Later I tried to understand why these events were such a big deal to elders. Eclipses were considered to be an important event from ancient times. Especially people who worshiped the sun considered the eclipse as a negative force which plunges the earth into darkness.  In the middle of the day, the sun suddenly going dark is viewed as a bad omen. Which could be a frightening experience. I don’t want to be a quintessential rebel and judge my Elders’ belief. While science has given the perfect explanation for the natural phenomenon like Solar and Lunar eclipse, religion always chooses to lie in the domain of faith in the unknown rather than accepting the facts to usher in a change.

What was your experience on eclipse watching? Do you have any restrictions or family ritual to follow during an eclipse? Share your stories with me .

Raising World Children | Prega

 

Suja Dinesh Raising World childrenSindhuja Kumar is a proud mom and a lifestyle blogger living in Connecticut, USA and origin from Tamilnadu, India. She is happily married and nothing excites her more than being a mom. She blogs to keep herself sane, more or less writing about positive parenting adventures, DIY Craft tutorials & scrumptious recipes that empowers every mom and woman to stay inspired and living an elegant life in a creative way. Check her work @ PassionateMoms.