I am the Mom of the Average Child

Yes, you read it right. I am the mom of an average child. By average, I simply mean my child is the average learner, average in scoring marks, average in sports and in extra curricular activities. What’s special about him then? NOTHING as per society and school norms.

I often get asked, oh! You are an Indian.. Your son must be good in math and studies in general… I simply say no, he is not. He is average. Am I ashamed to say this? No.. Should I be lying that he is the best in something which he is not, in front of others? Definitely no.

My son is that average child who people fail to notice either for not being at the top or being at the bottom. People fail to notice his sweet smile ,funny talks, tight hugs, friendly personality, kind behaviour, mild manners, helpful nature because he is JUST an average child.

The school, society celebrates children who are top scorers or good in sports and extracurricular,which rightfully they should. Amidst all this, my average child who is a spectator and cheers his friends with full heart goes unnoticed.

His love for sports,( even when he knows he is not going to be selected for school team), his love for music(even though he knows he is not going to be selected for school choir) never diminishes. He does all this to enjoy it rather to compete.

Am I a mom who is not strict with him for not scoring at the top? Yes, I am strict to an extent and lost my cool many times in the past.

His words pierced through me when my 7 year old asked, “mummy do you not respect me”? How many of us thought we should respect children? We adults demand our respect each and every moment of our life. Why not a child?

Among children preparing for IIT, MBBS even at a tender age of 10 years. My average child is talking about traveling the world ,meeting new people and eating different cuisines.

My average child might or might not become a doctor, astronaut ,scientist. But, he is sure to grow up to be a good person, who will spread cheer.

Last but not least:

Notice the average child. All that child wants is a smile or a kind word from us adults for just being himself to give him assurance to trust the world.

Each child is different, so is each parenting Style😊

Mathangi Murali is a mom of two boys. She is a full time mom living in Cyprus. She enjoys learning new languages , reading and photography. She has recently ventured into blogging on parenting and motherhood. She believes that a happy child makes a happy world and every child deserves to be respected for their choices.

Before you go, check out our award winning, best selling book on parenting confident kids who have a global growth mindset.

11 Responses

  1. Prat

    I am so happy to know that someone feels and goes through the same experiences as I do. I live in a society of very caliber children who excels both in academics as well as music , sports or whatever they are into. But for my children it’s always a struggle and challenge and feels like you have survived tsunami before the final result and still not good enough and disappoints is all you can settle for. Also society only recognizes you for your job description and for the status. If not it’s a lonely world in a foreign land. After reading this article to know someone understands what my children and I have gone through feels you are not alone in this battle.

    • mathangi murali

      Hugs to you.This label does not define our children.They need to be reminded of that everday.It takes immense strength to not give up and not lose innate spirit when the world around you repeatedly says you are just not good enough.Our children should not lose this battle against rat race and come out as someone who still loves this world even if the world has been harsh on them.Thats my only wish.and yes, you are not alone.We are in this together!

      • Swapna Aphale

        Thank you Mathangi Murali. My son shared this with me when he found that i am upset at my daughter’s result, sayimg i found this article, Ashtami was telling me you’re worried about mitthi’s boards, don’t be. She’s not here to study, she’s here to spread cheer, as long as that’s in place nothing else matters.

        I am so glad to know that someone thanks same and that i raised a child who accepts average 😍

  7. Kajal

    I honestly wouldn’t have bothered to create a login and comment if it wasn’t a wonderful blog and if I didn’t identified with it 🙂.
    But I would point out that our children are not really average they are average by the societal standards and who gives a damb about those standards anyway 😀?

  9. Rajalakshmi

    Hi Mathangi, I had come across this post almost a year back but searched for it in google today to read again. I am a mother of a high achiever son and a daughter who fits the ‘average child’ definition. . My heart goes out to her as she is worn down with the burden of proving herself. I am really confused bcos I do see she’s intelligent but she doesn’t have the urge to convert into marks. I wonder what should be my role & what is the right balance in the competitive world we are living in.
    Anyways, ur blog gives so much comfort, thank u for that

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