The Responsibility Brown Parents Have Towards Their Children

We as a community do not talk to our children about equality and racism, enough! The hard stuff needs to be discussed, even if it is uncomfortable. As brown parents, we have a responsibility towards our children.

A man is murdered ruthlessly on the road.
Another is fake complained upon …
And yet other people are arguing about their RIGHT to BEING FREE when the world is quite literally dying around them.

THIS is not the AMERICA or WORLD I want my children to grow up in! If you are not affected by this, then I’m sorry to say you are PART of the problem.

Do you not see the depth of privilege WE are surrounded by?

You know, growing up I was surrounded by religion-ism (thinking one religion is better than another), discrimination by skin color (because of course fair means beautiful), money-ism (because money means status and showing off your money is VITAL).

And I was blind to it all!

Why? Because of my parents. For they NEVER talked about it. And now when I think about it, they must have thought “Eh! This is just the world we live in.”

The pros of it. I NEVER walked into a room I didn’t automatically think I was equal to everyone. The con, with time, I assumed people KNEW BETTER.

They DON’T!

As I grew up, I saw brown people quite naturally always being subservient to either race or money or someone being fairer.

As a parent, I tell my kids, you should not say bad words. You should not play guns with friends (shaping your hand like one). You should not do this and that.

When my son says, “his friends do it.” I say, “Well, it is different for them. We cannot do the same. “

THIS freedom that THEY have and WE do not.Why? Because people have gone around shooting kids/people willy nilly and now WE need to be careful.

WHEN it comes to girls being molested, we DO NOT TALK to our boys. WE tell our girls to be careful, wear clothes appropriately, do this and that.

AND the ENLIGHTENED ones among us, say, “Hey! The problem is BOYS. Talk to the boys.”

The point is BOTH need to be talked to. But not as you may think.

Girls needs to be told about their RIGHT to stand up for themselves and given the freedom to be who they are and BOYS need to be TAUGHT to respect them.

In the same way, we need teaching our COLORED children about their RIGHT to EQUALITY and children who are NOT simply about the RESPECT they need to show every single day.

EQUALITY SHOULD NOT BE SOMETHING WE DO NOT ALLOW ANY CHILD TO FEEL.

Not realizing how much you are discriminated against, in this country – you continue to think – “Brown is the lesser black”, not realizing you are a person of color and no matter how hard you try; you and your children will always have to try harder.

You also use your own racism selectively. Crying wolf when you are being discriminated against but being quiet when you see a fellow black being discriminated against.

We need not have ANY children walking around feeling less than for whatever reason. Be it skin color, money, race or religion.

As brown parents, we feel the responsibility. I have always talked to my kids. I wrote two books about raising them EQUAL. I SPEAK UP!

HAVE you made the choice to RAISE your children AWARE? OR are you still hiding under the ROCK of “This does not affect me?”

Trust me, all your discrimination, even the slightest seeps through to your child.

Things you can do ?

* Read historical events and understand them with your child.
* Talk openly about life choices, worth of each person, the privilege you have.
* Acknowledge all people around you.
* Amplify voices of those that are talking about these things. Share this.
* Read books about skin color, different cultures, religions, own voices, brown parents, raising multicultural children. MAKE the EFFORT to DIVERSIFY your library.
* Speak UP! Do the right thing when needed.

I have never thought about our leadership. Today, for the first time I have found myself wondering am I safe in a world that is being protected and governed by people, none of whom understand the community.

Let’s raise kids who aspire to govern and protect. Children who while rooted in their identity are strong in will and empathetic to all.

Let’s just DO BETTER in understanding RACE and the conversation around it. The world cannot STAY like this.

For not only am I looking at you, but your child AND the CHILDREN AROUND YOU are looking at you as well.