My Experience During The Gulf War in Kuwait

My Experience During The Gulf War in Kuwait

We lived an idyllic life. My small family thriving. Dad doing two jobs. My brother just born and me, a ten-year-old busy in excelling in school, dance classes and playing with friends.

A country’s leader put his country first and my family and thousands more like us lost everything they had built in the years leading up to that date. He not only destroyed his own country and people, but ruined thousands of innocent lives. When Saddam Hussain decided to invade Kuwait. 

The morning of August 2nd 1990.

When people hear I was  in Kuwait when the Gulf war happened, they want to know what it was like. It has taken me years to be able to put it down on paper. Those are hard but innocent memories. Somehow the time seems right now.

August 2nd 1990 – Iraq Invades Kuwait

10 year old me wakes up groggy. Into an alternate universe. I see my mom filling up bottle after bottle with water. The kitchen is lined up with bottles. Soda bottles, milk bottles. Every container empty or available. I look right, in the bathroom the tub is full of water. The windows have been blacked out with black garbage bags taped to them. There is a weird haze around the house.

“What happened mama?”

“Iraq attacked Kuwait. The county is full of Iraqis,” my mother replies in the midst of filling up bottle after bottle.

I know at the age of 10 life is never going to be the same.

My father comes home from the bank with all the money he can withdraw and his passport. He doesn’t seem worried but is saying,”The streets are of full of dancing Iraqis. They waved to me calling me Hindi. Kuwaiti soldiers are nowhere to be seen. Poor boys. 18,19 years-old. What do they know about war?”

Mom packs up everything one thing at a time. Within a week most things we own are in bags around the house, to make for easy escape. (In retrospect that was just an easy way to make sure all our things got stolen, which they did!)

We are holed up in our home with a bachelor friend of dad’s. Dad and that man go out once or twice to stock up on food.  Day after day is spent indoors, bored with a sense of urgency sprinkled over every moment.

Bombs keep going off in the city. The scariest was on the mosque right behind our apartment building. It was so close. We hide under our dining table wondering where the next one will fall.

We live near the Kuwait airport so my dad is worried that soon soldiers will come scavenging. Mom and dad decided to move into a house into the city where four other families were living. Before we leave, my dad writes on the wall, “Please don’t take family photographs. ”  (They took them all)

For a ten-year-old being in a house with 13 adults and a baby, it is like being at a long, boring party. I keep myself busy exploring the house, missing my own. 

One day, the news comes that there is a flight in which I.K.Gujral will take as many Indians as possible. This is probably one of the first rescue missions there is. We go tagging along with the families we were living with.

We reach the airport only to find to our immense disappointment that the plane was already full. As with all things in life, the people with the most ‘influential friend’ were on board.

When my father finds out, he loses it completely. He grabs the man in charge by the collar, raises him off his feet and threatens to make pulp out of his face.

“What are men doing on the flight? They can take care of themselves. Put in more women and children,” he bellows. More men desperate to their wives and children on the plane join in and soon my mom and I are sitting on the floor of a fighter plane with a 7 month baby and a only one bag full of diapers.

The plane is  now full of women and children.

My mom gives me a paper to go take autograph of the foreign minister, I.K.Gujral. He does so kindly, patting me on the head. I remember everything about that flight. The pensive faces, the restless kids and the constant hum of the engine, louder than usual planes.

We enter India with cameras flashing. Reaching my father’s paternal home, we were given a room on the roof. We live that way for a day with nothing but the clothes on our back.

A day later my mother’s relatives come with clothes and basic necessities. My uncle takes me out to have a non-vegetarian meal as a treat! I understand that is a big deal for a vegetarian to do. He buys me some toys, too. The sun hasn’t shone so bright in weeks! I take in the streets in Gwalior, a city in the center of India, for the first time.

I hate the tin roof and the freezing floor of the bathroom. That and lagging behind in studies. My mom understands I’m worried when my Dad would join us in India but gets me back on track saying, “You have to excel.”

I stop eating. My cousins are fun but I miss my home and all my friends terribly. My dad finally joins us. He and many other fathers had to drive for weeks through Iraq and Jordan and then taking a flight from there to India. Within a few months we move to a different city, into a new home! 

My Altered Perception After 

All through the next decade I lamented to people first in sincerity and then in jest that, “Saddam Hussain took away everything. Even my toys. My dollhouse, seven Barbies and one Ken. ” But I didn’t just lose my home and toys, but my childhood. Childhood is not toys and luxury, but the security of believing you are safe and loved by everyone around you.

We went back to Kuwait in 1993 but our home was gone. Every thing and person had changed.

We had it MUCH easier than others who had to go to India on a ship with no food for weeks or others who had to live in camps waiting in distress for transport to India. We were probably one of the luckiest of those affected, all thanks to my Dad who took a stand where others wouldn’t. I still remember him towering over me, manhandling the man fighting or every woman and child at that airport. 

To this day he says, ” With you and your mom and brother gone and safe, that night is the first night I slept peacefully.

“With great power comes great responsibility,” is not just a line for superhero movies. Each of us has the power to affect the life of another. Bad things happen when good people stand by and do nothing. 

Today, I am a parent. I have built a home with my husband and two children, and often shudder to the core to think what my parents went through each and every minute of those months. To have nothing to show for the home they built in the period of 12 years.

Please always choose to take a stand for what’s right! How do you think you would react to this situation.

My Experience of the Gulf War - Raising World Children | Kuwait | Life | History | Life lessons | Milestone

First Published on Mompreneur Life and Silver Linings 

Aditi Wardhan Singh is a mom of two, living it up in Richmond Virginia in USA. Raised in Kuwait, being Indian by birth she has often felt out of place. A computer engineer by profession, she is now a freelance writer and entrepreneur having founded Raising World Children. In her spare time she volunteers for Circle of Peace International and impromptu dance parties with her little one are her ultimate picker upper. She provides tools to open minded parents to empower their children to raise positive, gracious, global thought leaders. She currently writes for the Huffington Post, Thrive Global, Richmondmomsblog, Desh Videsh Magazine and is author in an upcoming Anthology 100+MomsOneJourney as well.
7 Tips To Make a Road Trip Tantrum Free with Kids

7 Tips To Make a Road Trip Tantrum Free with Kids

” You are so brave! “

” Will the kids sit for so long? “

” It is going to be so hard with little kids. “

These are just some of the comments of disbelief we heard when we announced our cross country trip by car with our 6 and 3 year old kids. But we were adamant. With flight + baggage prices super inflated and every destination needing at least one stop over, it just made practical sense. Also, we had always wanted to see USA by road. Real people along real roads.

The experience was an outstanding one. We saw almost half of America’s beautiful vistas. Traveling from Virginia to Colorado to Chicago and Back. A little sight seeing, mountains and lots of indoor kids activities like Lego land, Ball Factory etc. We tried many different foods. We met a lot of old friends too.

The impromptu trip taught us to connect as a family and just Be!  On a personal level I learned how hard I was driving myself to achieve too much without focus. A new experience enriches our soul like no other.

As far as the kids were concerned, the 2 week trip, 12-15 hour long drives were tantrum free and thankfully, uneventful. They enjoyed every moment and I can see their growth. The first step of course is being completely prepared. Download our checklist of everything you will need for your road trip.

Road Trip With Kids Ultimate Pack Along List

No Preparation for Distractions 

The magic of something new fades pretty quickly these days. This trip was the first time I did not buy any little toys before leaving to shine in front of the eyes.

Instead, every second or third stop we got the kids candy/toys which served as both souvenirs and distractions. The car ride was spent exploring new vistas with their new play things. We even bought the kids tiny bags that they cherished carrying around with them.

Make The Itinerary An Activity 

We kept the kids pretty much in suspense the whole trip. So when leaving we told them of all the sights we would see in  St. Louis. At St. Louis, we told them all the fun things planned for them in Colorado.  In essence, the discussion of the destination becomes an activity in itself. This had a two pronged effect.

  1. They got super excited and asked questions along the way.
  2. They got involved in the planning on the way.

Food/Potty Breaks at Scenic Routes

You may be surprised how happy kids get seeing beautiful spots and exploring a lovely place even in the middle of no where. And they if they are kids like mine who love posing, they get a kick out of memorable clicks !

Breaks Every 2-4 Hours

Even if the kids are sitting and not asking to go to potty, take a break. It gives them a chance to stretch their legs, have some fun running around while breaks the monotony of the ride. It is a preemptive strike against boredom!

Stay Screen Free For Longer Periods

The temptation to keep the kids pacified aside, ensure to stay screen free for long periods of time. Gadgets can be used when you need to catch a nap or the kids truly get antsy.

  • Classic games are I Spy, License Plate, I’m Going on a Picnic, What Am I Thinking of.
  • Try to work learning into road-trip games. I love making games up on the fly!
  • Another favorite is making robots, letters from things at the table at the restaurants.

Download New Shows/Apps On  The Go 

Every spot that had free Wifi got utilized to give the kids hope for exciting new fun to come! Make sure to keep their Most Loved app/show a secret  for when you hit a traffic jam !

CDs Of The Kids’ Favorite Shows/Movies

This tip is for those who have a movie player installed in the car. Target has a great selection of $5 movies. Also, since we were only going to be gone 2 weeks, we borrowed a lot of CDs of the kids’ favorite shows/movies from the local library. With the two week return policy it was a God sent. Also, Redbox is a great option with it’s many locations.

Rare Snacks 

This trip, I made sure to keep snacks they love but haven’t had in a long time and have been banned at home. They relished the fact that they could enjoy rare treats on the mini vacation. A Happy Meal which is a rare treat in our home was a great way to appease them.

Include Strangers Into the Trip 

My kids and I love people watching and talking to strangers. Strangers are after all friends we haven’t met yet! Simple conversations lead to enriched experiences. Also, the kids I believe learn to accept different people and their view points. Remember to stay safe though.

  1. Ensure the little ones know not to talk about your home, routine life or destination.
  2. Write the kids’ name, address and phone number and keep them in their pockets.

Bonus Mindset Trip –

As I worried about how they would do on the trip after our first 4 hours of drive, my husband responded. ” Kids are resilient. Remember that all year round, your life revolves around them. If they do get antsy or cranky, it’s okay. It’s a phase and it shall pass. They will learn a lot from the experience. ” And they did !!!

Have you taken a road trip? What would you add to our complete list of items to take on your trip ?  What are your tips for keep the trip comfortable and tantrum free?

Tips to have a memorable trip with kids tantrumfree www.raisingworldchildren.com | Travel | Travel with Kids | Road Trip | Memorable Travel | Tantrumfree

Aditi Wardhan Singh is a mom of two, living it up in Richmond Virginia in USA. Raised in Kuwait, being Indian by birth she has often felt out of place. A computer engineer by profession, she is now a freelance writer and entrepreneur having founded Raising World Children. Impromptu dance parties with her little one are her ultimate picker upper. She provides tools to open minded parents to empower their children to raise positive, gracious, global thought leaders. She currently writes for the Huffington Post, Thrive Global, Richmondmomsblog, Desh Videsh Magazine and is author in an upcoming Anthology 100+MomsOneJourney as well.

 

3 Parenting Mistakes When Teaching A New Language

3 Parenting Mistakes When Teaching A New Language

This is a sponsored post. All opinions that of the author.

I am Indian. Ideally, Hindi would be my native language. The realization that English was my first language came to light one bright and sunny evening a few years after my kids were born. 

At the park, an elderly Indian lady approached us and started making small talk. She asked the standard questions about where in India did I belong, where I worked etc. After a few minutes of watching my son and me, she questioned, “Your son doesn’t speak Hindi?”

When I replied in the negative, she retorted, ” But you stay at home, right ? How is it he hasn’t learned? “

Needless to say, I was livid! It was hurtful and insensitive on so many levels my mind hurt from thinking about it. 

Raising World Children Hindi

A few days later though, it made me introspect. I wondered about the kids I knew who did speak their native language. Comparing  all the things parents with native language speaking kids did differently than us. I asked questions. The most important answer that came across was, ” Make them speak Only in that language. ” Easier said than done!

My son would just say No to  even the theory of learning. In his head he is American and since none of his friends in preschool or teachers spoke Hindi, he just didn’t feel the need. It has been a couple of years of trial and errors and I am still working on the same. While, the resistance to learning Hindi has finally reduced thanks to friends in school who are bilingual or working on it, we still have a long way to go.

For the longest time, I never understood the base reason of why my son, whose parents are both Indian didn’t just naturally pick up the language ?!

Their main focus however is providing high quality language one on one coaching to eager students who want to learn new languages.

As I went through their blog, it reiterated the need to introduce and make that extra effort to raising multilingual kids. That is when my mistakes and the ways to correct the same came to light!

Not Speaking The Language Consistently At Home

Most of the kids I know who speak their native language have grandparents living with them for long periods of time. Or parents who speak the language at home. At our home, we speak English foremost. My husband and I speak English more often than Hindi. When I started thinking about why, that is when I realized in actuality English is my first language and it is hard for me to remind myself constantly to talk in Hindi.

I needed to first work on myself. 

On this suggestion,  I stuck post it notes around the upper level to teach the kids easy to learn words with pictures. Also, another friend suggested to stick post it notes around Everywhere to remind you to speak in Hindi or whatever language you want to teach kids. 

Not Letting The Kids Struggle

My son doesn’t speak but he understands Hindi completely. We know because he retaliates when we happen to talk in Hindi about doing something he doesn’t like. (Ha! ) But when it comes to conversing, it is hard looking at the kids flounder for the right word to use. Also, time consuming. In the hurry to get on with our day, we would give in and tell them in English what we were saying in Hindi. We wouldn’t stick with it.

I now take the time we in which we do homework to talk to my kids exclusively in Hindi. The instructions I need to give them are familiar and they find it easier to relate and respond. 

Not Reading To Them In New Language

Funnily Hindi books are hard to find and harder to read when you do. They are so content heavy that it is hard to get  kids to sit still for the reading. Little Linguine drove home the fact that I need to do the same.

I have now made simple, easy to understand short stories with a few English words thrown in to keep them interested.

Learning a new language can be daunting at any age. Together we can work towards creating an interest for new languages, specially respect for our native ones in our children. 

3 Mistakes Parents Make In Teaching Kids a New Language www.raisingworldchildren.com #languages #hindi #parenting #teachingkids #multicultural

Aditi Wardhan Singh is a mom of two, living it up in Richmond Virginia in USA. Raised in Kuwait, being Indian by birth she has often felt out of place. A computer engineer by profession, she is now a freelance writer and entrepreneur having founded Raising World Children. In her spare time she volunteers for Circle of Peace International and impromptu dance parties with her little one are her ultimate picker upper. She provides tools to open minded parents to empower their children to raise positive, gracious, global thought leaders. She currently writes for the Huffington Post, Thrive Global, RMB and is author in an upcoming Anthology 100+MomsOneJourney as well.

Fidget Spinners - Using Fads to Teach Kids 7 Core Values

Fidget Spinners – Using Fads to Teach Kids 7 Core Values

 

For me it happened overnight. The night before I saw the video of a father posting about his daughter’s joy on getting the “latest gadget”, the Fidget Spinners. The next morning, there were 4 kids at the bus stop spinning them. When I asked why were they taking toys to school, the response was, “They are allowed!”

Not knowing what to make of them, I took to Facebook and asked, ” Yay or Nay” and most parents said, Yay! No one had an answer for why though. Except a parent of a child on the autism spectrum who truly witnessed their child benefitting from the use.

A week later though, reports of the same being banned and teachers’ requests to please keep the toys limited to recess or better yet home started pouring in. Psychologists started coming out saying, there is no substantial proof to the claims that the fidget spinners improve focus at all!

Raisign World Children With Fads

This phenomenon is not new. We saw the same with Pokemon, Hatchimals, Tickle Elmo etc. A new toy comes into the market, with a cool gimmick attached to it. In this case, “helping kids focus” and  before you know it herd mentality of trying the “new thing” and over use causes the same to become a nuisance.

There’s always a thin line dividing the appropriate and the inappropriate. There seems to be an inherent loss of awareness of where that line is among the current generation. Humans are attracted to constant instant gratification, which can easily make things go out of control.

Nurturing a basic instinct of responsibility is paramount for success in life and that doesn’t just apply to games!

The crux is to recognize that simple rules or actions like the ones below instill the importance of moderation and self control.

Avoiding Peer Pressure

Sure, all the kids are getting them. But is your child asking for them? Mine didn’t. He said, ” It just spins. ” When we as parents get onto the band wagon of the latest trend just because others are doing it, we subconsciously teach the kids that it’s okay to follow. When in fact, we need to create thought leaders. Lead by example that it is okay to be different and have different choices than those around you, even your friends. 

Understanding The Trend

What was interesting to note though was that even parents were actively discussing with 5-10 year olds on whose fidget spinner was the best and why. While I am totally in for parents being in the know about what is “cool” to the kids these days,  I draw the line at getting pulled into the wave of blind fascination and needless competition that goes along with it.

If you as parent feel any latest fad would be useful for your child, discuss the same with them. Explain why they personally are getting the toy/gadget. What need of theirs is it fulfilling? This helps them understand what trend to follow and what to leave behind.

Establish Rules of Use

Teaching kids a key skill of doing things in moderation is important. By this I refer to the fact that when I asked kids why they were taking toys to school, most answered. ” They are allowed. ” Even if something is allowed in school, we as parents need to ensure that the children have limited use of the said item. The rules of use can be as simple as –

  • Do not use the gadget while in school.
  • Do not play with the video game more than x minutes at a time.

Defiance Need Not Be Rewarded

You don’t want to say yes but they throw a tantrum and say, ” Everyone has it! ” Saying no and hearing them cry, while frustrating is good for their resilience.

Yes, it is embarrassing and makes us hot in our face to have them throw a tantrum specially in the middle of a store. Brave through it because every other parent around you understands and the kids get a lesson by association. They learn that it is not the end of the world if they do not get in on a trend.

What To Spend Money On

Children understand much more than we give them credit for.  It may seem they are too young for it, but understanding the Why of what you as a parent are willing to spend money on gets them thinking of the importance of spending in the right place, at the right time. It’s not about the amount but the use of the item bought.

Make Them World Conscious

Make your children world wary. Share with them trends and stories from around the world. Discuss with them the dangers and positive outcome of each internet challenge, latest gadget, new fad etc. This gets their thinking gears moving and makes them aware of moral values, real world consequences and gives them a good directional thinking.

Every chance you get. Reading to them. Telling them about your childhood experiences even helps.

Getting Bored Is Okay

How often have you said or heard, ” They played more with the box than the toy that came with it.” ?

Let them think of ways to entertain themselves. Lots of time for free play, supervised and unsupervised. Unstructured play allows them to know how to keep themselves safe while keeping themselves entertained.

My favorite story  was that of a child who starting making and selling his own Fidget Spinners when he couldn’t find where to buy them! To my immense pride (and relief) my own son never asked for one, but wondering about the use eventually tried and succeeding in making the same from Legos.

Games, toys and trends have their own place in our social and mental growth but doing anything blindly, just because everyone else is doing it sends the wrong message to the youth. We need to nurture them to be self reliant in understanding core values of moderation and self control!

Using Fads Like Fidget spinners TO Teach Kids Core Values in Life www.raisingworldchildren.com #life #fads #fidgetspinners #corevalues

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Aditi Wardhan Singh is a mom of two, living it up in Richmond Virginia in USA. Raised in Kuwait, being Indian by birth she has often felt out of place. A computer engineer by profession, she is now a freelance writer and entrepreneur having founded Raising World Children. In her spare time she volunteers for Circle of Peace International and impromptu dance parties with her little one are her ultimate picker upper. She provides tools to open minded parents to empower their children to raise positive, gracious, global thought leaders. She currently writes for the Huffington Post, Thrive Global, RMB and is author in an upcoming Anthology 100+MomsOneJourney as well.