Being An Interfaith Family - My Story After Kids

Being An Interfaith Family – My Story After Kids

It took a letter to a bishop and a mountain of paperwork to marry my husband. He’s Catholic; I’m Methodist.

Both are Christian religions, so I’m hesitant to even call us an interfaith family, but you would be surprised how different we are. Years ago, I would have had to convert to be married “in the Church” as it’s called. Instead, I went to classes, met with a priest, and—here’s the kicker—agreed to raise my future children Catholic.

In Southwest Virginia, where I was raised, Catholics were a mysterious “other”. I knew Lutherans, Presbyterians, Methodists, and Baptists of all varieties. However, it was more common to find someone who believed in speaking in tongues than the literal transformation of bread and wine to blood and flesh.

I had exactly one self-identifying Catholic classmate. She and her siblings represented my sum knowledge of the entire religion. “She’s Catholic,” people would whisper.

Years later, I had to break the news to my family that I was not only dating a Yankee, but a Catholic. Fortunately, he’s a likable guy, so when he asked my dad for permission to marry me, my father said Okay. (Yes, I know, it’s the 21st century. No, not asking was not an option.)

We planned a wedding that incorporated both our faiths, performed by a Catholic priest (my husband’s uncle) in a Methodist Church. The entire thing was fraught with confusion.

“Why don’t you get married outside?” my mom asked.

“Because you have to perform the ceremony in a church,” I answered. “Sacred ground or something.”

“The outdoors—made by God—isn’t sacred enough?”

At the rehearsal, the priest told the bridesmaids to reverence the cross. They looked at him blankly. When he learned there were no chairs for the bride and groom to sit in during the ceremony, he looked like we were speaking in tongues. “Do you plan to stand the entire time?” he asked.

“It usually only takes twenty minutes,” I said. My bridesmaids nodded.

“My homily is that long,” he said. “I guess I can cut it down.” and we survived the wedding just fine!

When The Children Came 

We breezed along just fine as an interfaith couple—mostly because we spent very little of our 20s attending any church. But when our children arrived, the slight differences in our faiths became more and more pronounced.

My family members could not serve as official godparents to my daughters. Instead, we had to select one Catholic godparent and relegate my family to the role of spiritual advisers. The distinction – though subtle – ruffled me quite a bit.

In an effort to “raise our kids Catholic,” we began attending mass. I became more and more irritated each time I had to stand in the aisle while the rest of my family went up for communion. I attend mass more than most Catholics, but there I was waiting for everyone to walk past me—or worse, climb over me.

Someone eventually realized how alienating this could be, and my local church now allows those not receiving communion to walk forward, cross their arms, place them against their chest, and receive a blessing from the priest.

Young children receive this same blessing before they’re old enough for their First Communion. I’m happy to see some inclusive progress. This year, however, marked the biggest hurdle in our interfaith happiness with my oldest daughter starting Catholic education classes.

It came to me to drive her to church after school every Monday. I had to ensure she completed every homework assignment, the answers to which I sometimes didn’t know. “Ask your father,” I’d say. “I’m not Catholic.”

After asking a question about Penitence or Purgatory, she asked where Jesus was from.

“Bethlehem,” my husband answered.

“Seriously?” I said. “Your parents paid for nine years of private Catholic school and that’s the best you can come up with? Jesus was from Nazareth.”

“Mommy, you don’t believe in Jesus,” my daughter said.

My mouth fell open as various snarky responses flew through my head ! My husband corrected her but the more my daughter learned about Catholicism, the less she seemed to understand me.

I worry what she will think next year when we walk to the front of the church and she receives a communion wafer, and I, like her little sister, wait as the priest makes the sign of the cross on my forehead.

In some ways, my religion is too similar to hers to explain the differences. She will only know this: My mom is not like the rest of us. Will she think I am somehow less? I often worry that if we’re not careful, I may become “the other” in my own family.

[bctt tweet=”Being a part of an interfaith family was not an issue … until we had kids! ” username=”contactrwc”]

My  hope though is that being raised in an interfaith household will make my daughters more open minded and accepting of other religions—just as being in an interfaith marriage has helped me embrace differences.

Being an Interfaith Family - The Advantages and Disadvantages www.raisingworldchildren.com #interfaith #families #life #multicultural

Though a Southerner at heart, Kathryn Hively lives with her husband and two young daughters in New Jersey. Her blog Just BE Parenting promotes non-judgmental parenting and celebrates families in all forms. You can find her on Twitter here when she’s avoiding the dishes. Her work has also appeared in Scary Mommy, mom.me, Ravishly, and the Mighty, among others.
Fables - Who is Happy? The Crow or The Peacock

Fables – Who is Happy? The Crow or The Peacock

Who is Happy ? 

A crow lived in the forest and was absolutely satisfied in life. But one day he saw a swan. “This swan is so white,” he thought, “and I am so black. This swan must be the happiest bird in the world.”

He expressed his thoughts to the swan. “Actually,” the swan replied, “I was feeling that I was the happiest bird around until I saw a parrot. It has two colors. I now think the parrot is the happiest bird in creation.”

The crow then approached the parrot. The parrot explained, “I lived a very happy life until I saw a peacock. I have only two colors, but the peacock has multiple colors.”

The crow then visited a peacock in the zoo and saw that hundreds of people had gathered to see him. After the people had left, the crow approached the peacock. “Dear peacock,” the crow said, “you are so beautiful. Every day thousands of people come to see you. When people see me, they immediately shoo me away. I think you are the happiest bird on the planet.”

The peacock replied, “I always thought that I was the most beautiful and happy bird on the planet. But because of my beauty, I am entrapped in this zoo. I have examined the zoo very carefully, and I have realized that the crow is the only bird not kept in a cage. So for past few days I have been thinking that if I were a crow, I could happily roam everywhere.”

That’s our problem too. We make unnecessary comparison with others and become sad. We don’t value what God has given us. This all leads to the vicious cycle of unhappiness. Learn to be happy in what you have instead of looking at what you don’t have. There will always be someone who will have more or less than you have. Person who is satisfied with what he/she has, is the happiest person in the world.

Moral : ” Never be sad comparing yourself to others. Everyone has their own beauty and strength. “

Retold by Aditi Wardhan Singh. Illustrated by Shruti Prabhu.

Kindness - Theethya Satish Narayan

Kindness – Theethya Satish Narayan

 

I am Theethya. I am 5 years old. I live in Dublin, Ohio. I like to do drawing and craft work. I love to play with my dad and granny’s. My favorite cartoon is “Peppa Pig”.When I grow up I want to become a eye doctor. I like to sing and dance. My favorite game is to do puzzle fixing.


 

Kindness is doing something nice for daddy or mummy or friends. I made this frame for my dad. I want to surprise my dad while he come back from office. He really got surprised and I got hugs and kisses from him. I love when my mom and I are doing craft work. I made the frame using the popstick. I enjoyed painting the popstick and sticking the beads and foamsheets. It was a great fun doing this.

Kindness - Hazel Batra

Kindness – Hazel Batra

 

My name is Hazel. I am 6 years old. I like to do drawing and dancing. I don’t like to be out by myself. My favorite festival is Christmas. I like to eat pasta. I play with my little sister. I love my mom and dad.

 


Kindness is

  1. Feed the birds.
  2. Read books to someone.
  3. Open door for others.
  4. Sharing toys with your friends.
  5. Giving your lovely smiles.
  6. Donate food, drinks and toys.
  7. Make a thankyou card for teacher.
  8. Set table for dinner.
Kindness - Aarav Singh

Kindness – Aarav Singh

My name is Aarav. I like Ninjago lego toys. I don’t like kids that bully me. I like to eat pizza, fries and mom’s green chicken. My favorite Indian festival is Holi. My favorite American holiday is Christmas. I will make the world a better place by recycling and helping friends.

 


Kindness is helping each other. In Ninajago Lego, Jai helps Kai jump to make Lord Garbadon fall. He throws Kai into the air and destroys Lord Garbadon’s fort. By doing that, Jai showed being a good friend to Kai. Good friends always help each other. It is important to be kind to because it is the right thing to do. 

Kindness - Radhika Goyal

Kindness – Radhika Goyal

My name is Radhika Goyal. I am in First Grade. My favorite thing to do is play outdoors and art. My favorite thing is Ipad. Whe I play outside I like playing ball and hola hoop and bubbles. When I am drawing I draw happy things. I like going to Disney World. My favorite color is blue pink and purple. My favorite food is sambar rice. I am 6 years old.


 

Being kind is good. One way is to help someone when they are feeling sad. Another way is to share something. Another way that you can be kind is write a nice note to someone and give her a hug.

 

Kindness - Ailani

Kindness – Ailani

My name is Ailani. I am 5 years old. I like gymnastics and making people smile. I don’t like being bored. I want to be a gymnast when I grow up. My favorite holiday is my birthday!

 


I show kindness to my friends by making them smile and helping them when they need help. Being kind means sharing love and doing things that make people feel happy. My Mommy helps me with all of my business stuff and selling my candy bouquets.

Chinese New Year - Jiya Patel

Chinese New Year – Jiya Patel

Hi! My name is Jiya Patel and I am 10 years old and I love puppies. I also love to bake and want to be a baker when I grow up and adopt a puppy. My favorite festival is Holi which is an Indian festival of colors. During Holi we play with colors and we dance a lot. I love to get messy with the colors. The first time I ever celebrated Holi was when I was 1 year old, but I have not played in years until recently this year

 


 

The Chinese New Year (CNY) is also known as the Spring Festival in China. In 2017, CNY was celebrated on January 28, 2017. It is the most important festival or holiday in china of the whole year. On the CNY the most important part is the family reunion. A lot of Chinese people prepare for the New Year by going shopping, visiting relatives, and doing fireworks. This is a lot like the Indian Festival called Diwali. During Diwali me and my family gets together with relatives and do many similar things like shopping for new clothes and doing fireworks all night long followed by a big Indian dinner. I would love to celebrate the CNY, if I could as I would most enjoy going shopping and fireworks. My brother who is 4 years old is very scared of fireworks, and runs inside the house when we do fireworks as it gets very loud.

Chinese New Year - Riya Jaldu

Chinese New Year – Riya Jaldu

My name is Riya Jaldu. I am in third grade. My favorite thing to do is draw and make art. My favorite is dog (or puppy). I live in Fresco, Texas. My drawing is based on Chinese New Year.I chose because I love making designs. I knew I should have used my designing skills and made beautiful lanterns. The dragon is only good because I practiced. So, don’t look at this and say ” I wish I could draw like that”. You should say, ” Cool, I know if I practice one day I will be good like her.

 


 

Chinese New year also called as Lantern festival is an important festival celebrated by Chinese. It is also called Lantern festival because on that day thousands of lanterns are lit and released in the sky. And lots of people gather to see the dragon parade.It is their tradition. This festival celebrated between January 21 and February 20 according to Lunar calendar.

I have a friend who is Chinese, we studied together in 1st grade in my old school. Now she is in 3rd grade just like me. She said that each year is marked by one of the chinese Zodiac animals like, Horse, Ram, Monkey, Rooster, Dog, Boar, Rat, Ox, Tiger, Hare, Dragon, and Snake.

Chinese New year reminds me of Diwali because of the lights ( lanterns). The part that I would enjoy watching is the the lanterns float to the sky. I would really want to celebrate this festival because it would be cool to see the parades go down the street.

 

 

 

 

Indian Fairy Tales – All is Well, The Friends Test

All is Always Well

Once upon a time, there lived a King Sivarama Pandiyan. He was famous for his rule in the kingdom, supported by his able and intelligent ministers. One day, the King cut his fingers while eating fruits. On seeing this, his minister Veeraramaiah told that” All is well “. The King got angry and ordered to put him in prison.

On that day, the King went to forest for hunting. He was caught by forest bush men and was about to be killed. But suddenly one man saw that King’s finger had an injury. They left the King free, since they had a belief that the person who was offered for their God should be free from any injuries or marks in their body. So the King escaped luckily.

Then he returned to the palace and went to the prison. The King told this to Veeraramaiah. He again said,” All is well “. The King was curious this time and asked his explanation. He told that the King escaped due to the wound and he himself escaped since he was prison. Otherwise he would be with King and would be killed by the forest bush men. Now the King appreciated him for his positive attitude.

Moral: “All is well – Everything happens for the good!”

The Friends Test

 

Ramu and Somu were friends. One day they were travelling through a forest. At that time, Somu saw a bear coming towards them. Suddenly he climbed over a tree nearby. Ramu was totally confused and could not understand Somu. The bear was coming very near.

Ramu did not know climbing. He was much worried. Suddenly he got an idea and lay down on the ground. He also controlled his breath and acted like dead. The bear came near him and thought he was dead. So it went away.

After some time, Somu came down from the tree and asked Ramu ‘What did the bear told him in his ears?’ Ramu said that it asked me to avoid friends like you. Somu felt ashamed and asked sorry thim.

Moral: “Good friends are those who help during difficult times”.

Illustrated by Shruti Prabhu. Compiled by Vasantha Vivek

Indian Historical Stories – Chetak The Immortal Blue Horse

Chetak : The Immortal Blue Horse

 

Battles are won and lost. Leaving behind stories of heroes. Often times in war, it is not only the men fighting but the animals who fight for them that make for tales of glory.

Chetak was the horse of Maharana Pratap, whose role in the battle of Haldighati is worth repeating. Folklore has it that Chetak coat had a blue tinge to it. That is why Maharana Pratap is  often referred  to as the “Rider of the Blue Horse”.

Mahrana Pratap SIngh, King of Mewar found his biggest rival in the then Emperor of India Jalal ud-din Muhammad Akbar. Akbar was the one because of whom Pratap’s father had to flee from Chittorgarh and establish a new empire in Udaipur. Many Rajput Chiefs had expressed their loyalty towards Akbar but not Maharana Pratap.

The animosity brought the troops of Akbar and Maharana face to face in the battle of Haldighati. Pratap’s forces were decisively outnumbered but Maharana Pratap stood strong riding his royal, fearless horse Chetak. WhenMaharana Pratap realized that the battle was slipping away from his hands, he charged the elephant of the appointed captain of Akbar’s troops, Raja Man Singh. Pratap made a frontal charge and his fearless horse Chetak reared high in the air and planted his hooves on the forehead of the elephant. Pratap threw his lance towards Man Singh but missed.

During this hustle one of the tusks of the elephant tore Chetak’s rear leg, crippling him. This was a pivotal moment in the battle. Maharana Pratap had to retreat .

Inspite of his fatal would, Chetak  ran for miles and miles, even jumping high and through a river to get his master to safety.  Once assured that his master was out of danger ,Chetak collapsed and let out his last breath.

Chetak’s heroic act of bravery and loyalty towards his master made everyone forget the defeat Maharana Pratap had to face during the battle. Instead, it is his  his death that  has been immortalized in the ballads of Rajasthan.

Moral : Bravery displayed in the face of challenges becomes immortalized.

Illustrated by Shruti Prabhu. Retold by Vinni Mishra